from Dan Savage in The Stranger

A discussion with Seattle wait staff, mention of our topic:

Dan: What's worse, fussy straight couples or fussy gay couples?

Kelly: Depends. Like lesbians?

Dan: No, like gay men.

Kelly: Lesbians are always worse tippers than gay men.

Dan: Why do you think that lesbians are such bad tippers? That stereotype just dogs lesbians everywhere, and yet there's always a grain of truth in stereotypes....

Alan: I mean, we can generalize about everybody. [Flying Fish] has a lot of great lesbian customers, and we serve a lot of polite gay men also. But then there are your fussy, old, 55-year-old queens and you just want to smack the shit out of them.

Kelly: They're the ones who hate women, who don't want a woman to wait on them; they want cute little busboys to come over to them.

John: I've never had a problem with waiting on gay men. They're great tippers, and always so nice to me.

Everybody: BECAUSE YOU'RE A CUTE YOUNG BOY.

Min: I once had an old, mean Southern queen order a mint julep from me, and even though I was busy, I did the whole thing--made an amazing mint julep with Maker's Mark and fresh mint that I scrounged up from the kitchen and chopped up myself; I even muddled, and garnished beautifully. I brought it to him, and he actually had the nerve to push his drink away and say, "Honey, I like my ice shaved--not crushed." And left without paying for his drink.

Dan: And Min's been treating gay men like shit ever since.