Lesbian Tipping Habits

A New Year's Resolution

2012-01-01T00:01:00.000-08:00

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For 2012 and every New Year:

Tip Generously for Good Service.

Think about it

2011-12-03T07:42:00.000-08:00

A quote from former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright.

There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women.

--Keynote speech at "Celebrating Inspiration" luncheon with the WNBA's All-Decade Team, quoted in Mechelle Voepel, ESPN (July 13, 2006)

Congratulations, Colonel Ginger Wallace and partner Kathy Knopf

2011-12-02T05:15:00.000-08:00

from The Washington Blade, posted in its entirety:

"Pinning on" ceremony "big deal" for lesbian couple

An upcoming “pinning-on” ceremony in which Air Force intelligence officer Ginger Wallace will receive the rank of colonel will be distinct among similar events involving other service members.

Wallace’s partner of more than a decade, Kathy Knopf, will help pin the new rank of colonel on her jacket during the event beginning at 3 p.m. Friday at the Pentagon.

Knopf is participating in the ceremony after the lifting of the military’s gay ban known as “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” which came to an end on Sept. 20.

Wallace, a lesbian, said she’s looking forward to acknowledging Knopf during the ceremony because the commitment her partner has made “is just as real as any other spouse.”

“To be able to acknowledge and thank her is a big deal, and I’m just so thankful to be able to do it before I retire,” Wallace said. “There was one point where I thought I would retire before ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ was repealed, so I never thought I’d see the day. So, I’m very thankful to be able to do it.”

Wallace, a lesbian, entered the military in 1990 and worked through the entire span of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” from when it was passed into law in 1993 until its end in September.

Knopf said she’s pleased the timing of the ceremony took place after the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” so she could take part.

“It’s just nice after 11 years to be able to have it recognized and not dance around the issue any longer,” Knopf said. “So it’s wonderful for me to be able to play a small part and for both of us to acknowledge it instead of keeping it hidden after so long.”

Wallace, 43, is currently participating in language training in anticipation that she’ll be deployed to Afghanistan in the spring as part of the Afghanistan-Pakistan Hands Program, which is geared toward building long-term relationships with South Asian countries. She lives in McLean, Va., with Knopf, 50, who works as an analyst for SpecTal, a government contractor.

In addition to her partner, Wallace’s brothers and parents will participate in the ceremony. During the event, her new rank will be pinned on both her jacket and shirt. Each family member is slated to help in a different way.

“So Kathy and my brothers, James and Ryan, will pin on my rank on my jacket, and then I’ll take that off and then my parents will do my rank on my shirt,” Wallace said.

The “pinning-on” ceremonies are major events for service members in which they celebrate the advancement of their careers with family members and friends — especially when the promotion is to a high rank like colonel.

Alex Nicholson, executive director of Servicemembers United, said he knows of U.S. troops who’ve participated in such ceremonies with their same-sex partners even with “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” in place. Such participation was possible because a service member could designate whomever they wanted to take part — including a same-sex partner — without referring to them as such.

Still, Nicholson — who’s also slated to attend the event with Wallace — said the events are more meaningful for gay service members in the wake of the end to “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”

Nicholson added Wallace’s ceremony is the first that he knows of since “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” was lifted in which a same-sex partner has participated.

Even with repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” Wallace said she thinks some gay service members will keep their sexual orientation a secret. But Wallace said she wanted to make a statement with her “pinning-on” ceremony.

“I don’t really have anything to lose, and I think it’s important to make people more aware of what we’re trying to do as far as equal rights go and moving from being second-class citizens to being first-class citizens,” Wallace said.

Wallace said the end to “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” was “the biggest day” over the course of her 21-year career in the military, although she finds the change difficult to describe.

“I’m not sure that my life is really any different except for what I talked about before — just the release and now knowing that I can’t lose my job and lose the life that I love simply because I’m gay,” she said.

Comment:

We congratulate Air Force Colonel Ginger Wallace and her partner Kathy Knopf and wish them all the best. Well done!

Hat tip to AmericaBlog Gay.
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from Bitch Session a few years ago

2011-11-20T18:25:00.000-08:00

This is cached and there's no date, so we'll post today.

As a waiter for more than 20 years, lesbians are poor tippers. A group of nine, with a total bill of nearly $300 for food and drinks, left me $2.

[ . . . ]

I’m in agreement with the comment that lesbians are bad tippers. I know tons of lesbians who make far more than I do and either tip poorly or leave no tip at all. Yet lesbians are demanding of a waiter’s time.

[ . . . ]

To the idiot that says that a tip is based on what you spend and not what you earn: It seems that we cheap lesbians know the value of the money we earn, so if you’re mad that we aren’t tipping you, here’s a tip: Get a better paying job!

Comment: Yes, three in one week; this theme was so popular that specific comments and responses continued . . .

From Craigslist Vancouver

2011-11-13T18:37:00.000-08:00

From Craigslist Vancouver: 10% is no longer an acceptable tipping amount!

[ . . . ]

Not only does 10-15% make you look CHEAP, a women, a lesbian or Asian (yep, stereotypes exist for a reason, and you fulfill them everyday) it also barely even covers the costs the server has to "pay" into the restaurant to serve you. On your total bill AFTER TAX, the server must give away 5%-9% of that bill to the establishment. Which is divided among the bartenders (who made your drinks, how do you think they get paid?), to the support and to the kitchen and management. All which keeps the costs of the restaurant down, which in turn keeps your prices down. SO, if you Scroogely (okay that's not a word...) tip 10%...you are leaving the server with 4%-1%! ONE PERCENT!

[ . . . ]

A side comment on a gay blog

2011-09-25T18:54:00.000-07:00

Gay guy and his young posse of straight men:

My niece just told me this story. Over the summer she worked for AKS (BUD Light) as a rep at all the bars at the shore. They were told gay men are the best tippers (lesbians, the worst)...that a decent looking guy can make up to $700 per night, on top of the money he gets paid from AKS, just for standing there promoting Bud Light. So, two of their friends decided to give it a try.

[ . . . ]

Celebrate the End of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell": Tip Generously for Good Service

2011-09-20T19:52:00.000-07:00

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The long-awaited End of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" is here.

Celebrate!

Tip generously for good service.

Remember: Tips are Good Karma.

And Karma never lies.

Provincetown MA Women's Week: 07-16 OCT 2011

2011-09-17T11:44:00.000-07:00

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It's that time of year again: Women's Week in Provincetown, Massachusetts, at the tip of Cape Cod, sponsored by Women Innkeepers of Provincetown.

When? October 7-16, 2011.

Why? To enjoy a week in Provincetown with like-minded women.

Any tips to a great experience? Yes. Tip generously for good service.

Thank you.

from weezy on DonRockwell.com

2011-09-16T18:46:00.000-07:00

Weezy's comment re waiters ignoring customers who do not order alcohol:

This is something that I'm noticing within the discussion (not just porcupine's post, it's simply the most recent ), and that I have noticed myself when dining with women friends and teetotaling v. dining with a man and teetotaling -- I never get the diss when I'm dining with a male companion. It only happens if I'm dining with a woman or women. So, is it less about drinksism and more about sexism? Do waiters see me with my oft-times dining companion, a crunchy granola type gal, and figure we must be a lesbian couple and therefore tip poorly? Obviously our figures give a clue that we are both extremely fond of food even to our detriment, so that can't be the reason.

Our Labor Day Message: Tip Generously for Good Service

2011-09-05T15:53:00.001-07:00

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The President of the National Organization for Women discusses persistent women's wage inequality, with particular emphasis on women of color and female-headed households. We agree that income inequality is a serious and growing problem in this country, going beyond the high-profile examples of CEOs taking home obscene amounts of money, to the concerns of regular people everywhere.

That said, these are complex problems and the longer-term solutions she advocates, e.g., a government jobs program, even if approved tomorrow, are not likely to be fully implemented any time soon.

Fortunately, every one of us can do something about income inequality right now:

Tip generously for good service.

Remember: Tips are Good Karma. And Karma never lies.

Farewell, Vagina Tree

2011-09-02T18:07:00.000-07:00

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A tree grew in Brooklyn, The Vagina Tree.

After Hurricane Irene, The Vagina Tree is no more.

Celebrate the memory of The Vagina Tree:

Tip generously for good service.

Hat tip to AmericaBlog Gay.

Senator Barbara Mikulski [D-MD]

2011-08-26T06:13:00.000-07:00

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So, Maryland's senior Senator, Barbara Mikulski [D], is the subject of a petition drive urging her to co-sponsor the federal Respect for Marriage Act, which would repeal the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act.

The real issue, of course, is how she tips.

Hat tip to AmericaBlog Gay.

Update: Sen. Mikulski will co-sponsor the DOMA repeal bill.

Marriage Equality in New York State

2011-07-24T00:01:00.000-07:00

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Everyone knows that Marriage Equality takes effect all across New York State today.

Celebrate Marriage Equality by tipping generously for good service.

Tips are Good Karma. Karma never lies.

"Dear God . . . make money come out of my butt."

2011-07-18T17:55:00.000-07:00

from America's New Family, a lesbian couple:

Dear God . . . make money come out of my butt.

[ . . . ]

I’m sure many of you can relate to the “just making it” lifestyle…and we are immersed in it!
On a gay note, I wait tables and I’ve found that lesbians are the WORST tippers. I was talking to Rachel about this and she said “well think about it, two women probably make less than say two men, or a man and a woman.” I was shocked to hear her say this and replied, “seriously Rachel, do men still make more than women in the same jobs.” She says yes…Not always, but yes.

[ . . . ]

Lesbians and Frugality

2011-05-26T21:58:00.000-07:00

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Lesbians and Frugality

Why are lesbians so tight with money, seems to be the opposite of most gay men. I don't know why lesbians are so cheap but, it sure must make for not such a pleasant way to live having to watch every penny you spend.

Great comments, too.

Dinah Shore Weekend in Palm Springs CA

2011-03-27T16:56:00.000-07:00

A major Lesbian event is Dinah Shore Weekend, a womyn's golf tournament in Palm Springs, CA.

And from the Comments:

hahahahaha....Yeah, I bet the City is Happy, BUT NOT the Waiters, Waitresses and Bartenders!!! Lesbians, it is a KNOWN fact, are THE WORST (CHEAP) Tippers of ALL people!!

And from a comment on a wait staff blog re other patrons

2011-01-04T09:49:00.000-08:00

Tom says:

@jl

[ . . . ] Sure, people are people, and you will find exceptions to any statistic. That’s why you should never prejudge someone. Give everyone a fair chance before you deem them a stiffer. [ . . . ] But as you said, they aren’t the only ones. Here’s a list of other groups of people that tend tip poorly:

Old ladies ($2 was a decent tip in 1960, but not anymore)
Lunch groups after church (a bible tract is not a tip)
Businesses (if you offer delivery)
Lesbians (however gay men tend to tip well)

Treat all these people with the same service you offer everyone else, but you can still mentally ready yourself for the stiff.

Celebrate Repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell": Tip generously

2010-12-19T06:30:00.000-08:00

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Attention Lesbians and all Americans, indeed, everyone of good will-

Now that the United States Senate has joined the House of Representatives in repealing "Don't Ask, Don't Tell," and it is anticipated that the remaining steps will be completed without major drama, please celebrate this major Civil Rights milestone in the best way possible:

By tipping generously for good service.

Karma is real. Karma comes back multi-fold (and we're not talking about the Prosperity Gospel here) and results in more positive energy among everyone for the benefit of all. Tips are Good Karma.

Yes, the so-called GLBTQ Agenda remains unfinished, but repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" is a major accomplishment and milestone on the road to full civic equality for everyone.

So, let's celebrate. Tip generously for good service, and help spread a positive message of love and good cheer, not just in this holiday season, but all the time.

And let's get to work on Marriage Equality and the Employment Non-Discrimination Act in the New Year.

Thank you.

And a Comment on Autostraddle

2010-11-14T16:16:00.000-08:00

from a Comment the donation-dependent lesbian website Autostraddle.com [scroll down to second GrrlRomeo]:

The sarcasm was completely lost on me because it’s a thing that people really believe. Another one is that lesbians are bad tippers.

What Are Some Lesbian Stereotypes?

2010-11-05T15:08:00.000-07:00

Here's one Lesbian Stereotype [scroll down to SpinCompass]:

Bad tippers

More Direct Action: That Lesbian Mom Next Door

2010-07-29T09:39:00.000-07:00

Thank you, That Lesbian Mom Next Door. Money quote:

Our first stop was a classy piano bar kind of joint. Groups of gay men (as opposed to “boys”) were clustered around the bar watching a basketball game and cheering gustily. And, to my surprise, our waiter seated us at a very nice table.

Now there was a time when lesbians were given the worst seat in the house and then ignored. Since our waiter was practically tripping over himself to fill our water glasses, I think we’ve successfully killed the stereotype of lesbians as difficult patrons and lousy tippers. He even tried to aid us in our research. We explained our quest (locating the wild lesbian) and he replied (in an extremely Nelly voice) that he wasn’t gay, so he wouldn’t know where to go, but he’d ask the cook. He flitted off and came back to inform us we were right on the money and should continue as planned.

June 2010 Presidential Proclamation Pride Month: And a comment on our topic

2010-06-23T09:27:00.000-07:00

from Newsvine: Money quote:

I do remember way back when there was one performer who was female and performed as a male but then later had surgery to become a man, as far as I see from my experience at least that is not the goal of the Drag Kings that I am aware of. Another interesting point is that there are some gay men and some lesbians that dislike each other simply based on some prejudice that I am not aware of, if there is a reason it is not apparent to me. I will say that when I tended bar that lesbians were really bad tippers, but I ihate all bad tippers, not just lesbian bad tippers. I have more lesbian friends now then I used to have simply because I am active in the LGBT community here and it's the old saw that once you meet and talk to someone, it's easier to understand and associate with them, goes for anyone.

An Update

2010-06-05T18:14:00.001-07:00

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Well, this blog has been in existence for over six months. [Materials we find and post are backdated to the original publication date.] Preliminary conclusions:

While all of us are individuals, even without The Washington Blade's Bitch Session, there is definitely a stereotype out there that lesbians, as a group, are poor tippers. [However, probably the worst tippers, as far as consistent bitches, are the Sunday after Church crowd, perhaps because they were too generous with the collection earlier.] So it's time to do something about this problem.

We encourage all people of good will, of all genders and sexual orientations, etc., to include lesbians, to make a habit of tipping well for good service. Large cities, 20%, smaller cities, 15%, but why not be a little generous? Your budget should include an extra 15-20% for the wait staff; plan and order accordingly. And there's nothing wrong with letting wait staff know that you're aware of the stereotype, but don't follow it as long as they provide good service.

Wait staff also need to treat customers as individuals, divining their tipping practices from non-demographic elements of the interaction.

And if the service is not good, and can't be corrected by mentioning the problem, well, it's better to leave no tip than a bad one. Let's hope those situations are not common.

Let's be honest: Tips are good karma! And karma never lies. Thank you.
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Slammin' Salmon reviewed

2010-05-20T07:43:00.000-07:00

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Slammin' Salmon: An undercooked if surprisingly tasty filet of silliness from Broken Lizard:

[ . . . ]

The Slammin' Salmon is Miami's premier seafood restaurant, owned and operated with an iron fist and an iron head by former heavyweight champion and namesake personality Cleon Salmon. A year after embarrassing himself back when he was a lowly member of the wait staff, weak-willed manager Rich Parente (Kevin Heffernan) presents an ultimatum to the ragtag batch of new employees after Cleon has racked up a $20,000 debt to the Yakuza after a lost albino hunting wager. The server who earns the most money in one night gets a prize, be they front-row Norah Jones tickets or a three-night stay in Cleon's suite at a swanky hotel & spa resort. When those fail to boost morale, Cleon ups the ante by declaring a first-place victory worth $10,000 and a last-place haul resulting in a “broken rib sandwich.”

This sends the quirky ensemble crew scrambling to overachieve by any means necessary. For blonde ballet school temptress Mia (April Bowlby), it's a flirtatious demand for a party of men to all order lobster and an exposed neckline to a lesbian couple in the hopes of securing a large tip.

Per Andrew Sullivan, dream on . . .

Elena Kagan for SCOTUS

2010-05-10T16:12:00.000-07:00

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We don't know anything about Elena Kagan's sexual orientation, whatever it is.

But we very much do care about how she tips.
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The Washington Blade is back!

2010-04-30T17:29:00.000-07:00

OK, bitches, the Washington Blade is back! Still no Bitch Session, however.

Even if it takes them a while to sign Bitch Boy [or recruit a new one], we certainly hope they will restore the Blade's online archives, including those priceless bitches about lesbian tipping habits in Bitch Session.

from Kitchen Confidential: Wow!

2010-04-14T08:28:00.000-07:00

via Huffington Post. Money quote: Restaurants remember you . . .

...are a lesbian. Yes, I know that's an outrageous statement, but I've stats kept by a largely LGBTQ staff to back it up. I work in an environment where lesbian waiters routinely beg to be relieved of lesbian customers, who are constitutionally unable to order anything that's actually on the menu, demand that individual dishes be divided among separate checks, and then tip 5% because "you should serve only locally-grown, organic foods, and pâté is socially irresponsible!"

from Drudge Retort: Server Joke of the Day

2010-02-26T09:48:00.000-08:00

from Drudge Retort:

Server joke of the day:
What's the difference between a lesbian and a canoe?
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A canoe might tip.

DC's Lesbian Bar Phase One: 40 years and counting!

2010-02-26T09:00:00.000-08:00

Even our topic came up:

Is there such a thing as a profitable lesbian bar?

I doubt it. Interestingly, when Tracks first opened in the early 80’s that was supposed to be a lesbian bar. And actually Zeigfeld’s was supposed to be and they just evolved into other things because you just can’t count on women to bring in the money. So the Phase has ebbed and flowed over the years and there was a point in the mid-80’s where we would have 300-350 women come through here in a night. It was intense, it was awesome and it was packed. But once lesbian nights started, people had choice and that made a difference.

Now Angela brought in energy that hadn’t been here in a long long time. But it gets frustrating even with all the people she’s bringing in here. Women are notoriously bad tippers. This generation is better but with older women you’re talking about a generation who had to make it on their own and had lower paying jobs than men, especially in the working class and whatnot. You never do get a lot of the lawyers coming in here…

Haiku #1

2010-02-15T12:54:00.001-08:00

Scat queen at Nordstrom

Lesbian tipping habits

Bring back Bitch Session!

Further comment on WaiterRant

2009-12-09T08:40:00.000-08:00

Money quote:

Lesbians

My experience is that lesbians are the worst tippers.

Notoriously Bad Celebrity Tippers

2009-12-01T01:14:00.000-08:00

Here's a Comment re our topic [scroll down]:

<< 26. Victoria Beckham and Katie Holmes. Dined together in an upscale restaurant and didn't leave a tip. >>

Lesbians don't tip for s--t. This has been established.

Waiter Rant: Who are the worst tippers?

2009-11-30T08:33:00.000-08:00

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from Waiter Rant, it seems that there are many categories of poor tippers.

Comment #126:

I saw lesbians mentioned earlier so I wanted to share this. I’m a lesbian AND British and I always tip a minimum of 20%, usually more. I played for a womens full contact football team (at least 75% lesbians) and one particular restaurant would stay open late after games for us (we usually arrived 30 minutes or so before closing, but always with prior notice)partly because of how well we tipped and treated the servers. I agree that gay guys tip REALLY well. My experience with bad tippers has mainly been older people and the church crowd.

Comment 641:

Also, lesbians are the best tippers in Boston. For some reason they always leave 20-30%.

Comment:

Let's see if we can identify additional relevant comments.
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AfterEllen: Folks, can we talk about tipping?

2009-11-22T09:11:00.000-08:00

from AfterEllen:

Folks, can we talk about tipping?
Hi everybody; just wanted to vent a little and possibly make some non-tippers aware of the importance of tipping. i work as a pizza delivery driver, and i had a delivery tonight that happened to be to a cute little soft-butch dyke (okay, i'm just giving you my impression, but i'm pretty sure i'm right - hopefully she's not reading this blog. ha ha); anyway i got the pizza there in 15-20 minutes, because she only lived a few blocks away, we gave her an X-large pizza for the price of a large, my service was polite and professional, and it seemed like we were actually kind of hitting it off. imagine my disappointment later when i looked at the credit card receipt and realized that she stiffed me.

sad to say, but lesbians in general do not have a good reputation for tipping, and it does not reflect well on us. and don't anybody waste my time telling me that "you can't strereotype." yes, you can stereotype, and i've been in the business long enough to have drawn some pretty valid conclusions about who tips and who doesn't. i'm sure that some of you who work for tips could say the same thing.

as far as pizza delivery goes, the delivery charge is NOT A TIP. that fee goes straight to the company and is nothing more than a way for them to increase their profits at the expense of the drivers. drivers do get some (small) compensation, based either on commission, mileage, per deilvery rate, etc., but they have been getting that compensation since long before companies started charging a delivery fee. when delivery charges were added, that money just went straight to the company.

drivers depend on tips to cover their gas and vehicle maintanence, but also to compensate them for the risks involved in the job - from accidents to robberies to getting stuck in the snow, etc. etc. if nobody tipped, no one would deliver pizzas, and those people who don't tip are basically free-loading off of the people who do tip. btw, the minimum half-way decent tip for pizza delivery is $2, but $3+ will definitely get you better service.

lastly, when someone doesn't tip it's like a personal insult to the driver/waitperson (assuming that the service was good). it's like saying "screw you." i once had a woman ask me for my phone number after she gave me a check for exact change for the pizza, and well, she would have had to have been way hotter than she was for me to give it to her after she stiffed me. i think it's time for lesbians to woman-up and start tipping better. and FWIW, gay men tip better than average, IMO.

Great comments, too.

Welcome DC Agenda!

2009-11-20T16:45:00.000-08:00

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So far, no Bitch Session, but please be patient and as supportive of DC Agenda as you can.

After all, there's far, far more to GLBTQ life in the Nation's Capital, and the entire country, than lesbian tipping habits.
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Bitch Session lives on!

2009-11-16T17:13:00.001-08:00

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Now that the Washington Blade has, apparently, shut down, please post your bitches about lesbian tipping habits in the Comments.

We kindly request that you stay on-topic: no bitches about bitches about lesbian tipping habits, please.

See SaveTheBlade.com for more information about, and to make financial contributions to, the currently volunteer effort by the staff to create a new publication serving the community.

We just hope it will include Bitch Session!

Lesbian Tipping Habits - Why?

2009-11-14T18:45:00.000-08:00

This blog is intended to collect all available research on tipping habits of discrete demographic groups, e.g., lesbians.

The purpose is to determine whether tipping habits of lesbians are noticeably different from those of others. That is all.

from a waitress in Provincetown

2009-10-24T15:49:00.000-07:00

Apparently, trans women are even worse than Lesbians. From a waitress in Provincetown:

Having to cover some of Ashley’s shifts made me crankier than usual this week, PLUS it’s Trannie week here in Ptown. Actually, it’s called Fantasia Fair, and it is a week-long conference and vacation for Transgender & Trans-sexual men & women. Now, y’all don’t get me wrong– I love all my Trans sisters & brothers. Just another color of the rainbow. It’s just that they’re so damned stingy with their tips! Worse than the Lesbians of Women’s Week. (Although generally less demanding than the Dykes.) I guess they’re stingy because they’re saving up for the next surgery or new outfit. One day, tips totalled less than $8 for the entire day! Come on, girls! Seida’s got to make a living too! I need new outfits (and wigs, makeup, etc.) too!

Hat tip to Femulate.

from Pam's House Blend: Q of the day: bad tippers, part 2

2009-10-23T08:57:00.000-07:00

No good money quote on bad tippers this time.

from Bitch Session

2008-12-05T06:26:00.000-08:00

from The Washington Blade's Bitch Session:

DEAR LESBIAN BITCH: THANKS for treating me like a piece of trash when I served you on Thanksgiving when I could have been with my own family and friends instead. Don't you know not to be cruel to the people who serve your food? I look forward to seeing you next time! Love, your gay waiter.

from El Paso TX

2008-07-03T19:04:00.000-07:00

from El Paso TX, scroll down to TXTwizter:

[ . . . ]

In my 20 years of being a server,
the BEST tippers have always been white middle age business men, other servers or bartenders, strippers, gay men, hair stylist and college students;
the WORST tippers are Black ghetto thugs and their "posse" and hoochie girlfriends, Dykey Lesbians, Old folks over 70, Mexicans in general, Sunday "after church" crowd, nurses and white trash.

Every other group kinda falls in the "average" category.

[ . . . ]

Thank you, Audrey!

2008-06-04T09:02:00.000-07:00

One person can change the world. Money quote:

It was fantastic to be in an auditorium with all the most famous and sacred gay and lesbian authors of all time! Magic was in the air last night. At the at the pre-awards reception, I went up to the bar and got a lovely glass of red wine...included in the ticket price surprisingly, and put a $5 tip on the counter. The gay barman's face lit up, and I smiled to myself as the other gay men put down $1 bills. Single handedly, I was going to put to rest the stereotype of the "cheap" lesbian tippers!!!

from Gay Wait Staff

2008-05-08T08:12:00.000-07:00

from RealJock.com:

1969er: Anyone care to weigh in on lesbian tipping practices?

caesarea4: Is that like cow tipping?

I usually tip $1 when I get a glass of water at the bar.

What about carry-out?

irishboxers: It is if you're in Wisconsin.

As a former waiter and bartender, lesbians were tricky. Some tipped well, others were downright mean (run you ragged for that dollar on $80). In general, though, not so great. I had some lesbian regulars at my last bar and they tipped very well, but like I said they were regulars.

Hidden member: LOL about the lesbians.... amongst others.... whom we curl our toes, and roll our eyes about when we see at our bar or in our section...

silkrock: I sure do they are by far the worst tippers I have ever seen! I hate it when they want to act all nice about it. What a bitch.

The Happy Waitress

2008-04-21T18:31:00.000-07:00

from The Happy Waitress:

After my third consecutive lunch shift at the restaurant, the novelty has definitely worn off. Actually yesterday’s lunch was going pretty well until my last two tables. First were the lesbians- I thought I had this one in the bag since lesbians usually love me. In fact once as I was walking away from the table I heard one woman say to the other, “she is so sweet!” The magic was lost when they got the bill, however. It was $75 and they left me a $2 tip. Yikes!

from the same Lesbian blog: Potluck

2008-04-12T19:11:00.000-07:00

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Things Dykes Like

[ . . . ] (3) Dykes are cheap. (see future post on tipping)

Note: No such post has been observed
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from a Lesbian blog: Things Dykes Like

2008-04-06T19:07:00.000-07:00

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Things Dykes Like

Cant' blame a girl wanting to save some cash. (see post to come on lesbian tipping practices) Plus Chris hates to shop and Leslie takes care of the clothing budget.

Note: No such post has been noted.
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from a Lesbian Discussion Group: Stuff Lesbians Like Part 18: Being cheap to fund their food habits

2008-04-06T07:52:00.000-07:00

from Stuff Lesbians Like Part 18. Money quote:

Yes, we’re cheap. We’re not always the best tippers but please understand.. we’ll need the $5 to spend that old fashioned, 100000% butterfat ice cream “shoppe” after dinner.

Don't forget to check out the comments!

A survey with a different conclusion

2008-03-27T08:09:00.000-07:00

from Queercents: Money quote:

Lesbians were the most generous with their coffee shop tipping but by contrast, they were 10% more likely than gay men not to tip the bartender.

Don't forget the comments!

Yahoo! Answers on our topic

2007-12-31T09:07:00.000-08:00

Lesbians - How much do you tip?

from the Washington Monthly: further comment re Andrew Sullivan

2007-02-17T23:02:00.000-08:00

Here's a comment in The Washington Monthly in response to Andrew Sullivan:

I can affirm the part about Lesbians being lousy tippers: I played a few gigs for tips at a coffeehouse in Chicago around the turn of the century. On the night when we had a largely lesbian audience (one of the acts was apparently big with the lesbians), we had painfully low income. Like $5 for the band vs $40 on the other nights.

from Andrew Sullivan: Getting Checked Out by the Boys

2007-02-17T19:09:00.000-08:00

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Getting Checked Out by the Boys:

There's an economic niche here, if someone wants it. If you're a good looking straight guy in need of easy money, find a gay restaurant or bar and become a waiter or bar-tender. Gay men are great tippers, and they're even better tippers if you're hot. (Don't even think of getting tips from lesbians. There are exceptions, of course, but in general, look elsewhere.) I have a straight friend who made a small fortune as a deck-chair dude on the beach in Rehoboth. As so often, capitalism is the true corroder of prejudice.

[Emphasis added.]
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from Pam's House Blend: Q of the day: bad tippers

2006-12-17T08:48:00.000-08:00

We love Pam Spaulding of Pam's House Blend. Here's her take on bad tippers. Money quote:

I'm in agreement with the comment that lesbians are bad tippers. I know tons of lesbians who make far more than I do and either tip poorly or leave no tip at all. Yet lesbians are demanding of a waiter's time.
-- a Daily Bitch quote on the front page of the WashBlade
Is this some kind of stereotype that just won't die? All my lesbo friends tip well since we know how little waitstaff are paid -- tips are everything to these hard-working folks.

Kate and I are always generous tippers, so much so that in the places we regularly go, waiters and waitresses always remember us (sometimes after only being there once, which I cannot figure out) and want us to sit in their sections, and even chat with us about their day, their families, etc. We treat them like human beings -- and watch in horror as we see so many patrons skip out without tipping, or become the demanding table from hell.

Maybe it's because we're both polite Southerners and the above-mentioned Daily Bitcher is from one of the big cities (where the dykes are cheap)? Who knows? I simply think it's time to quash this stereotype.

Q of the day, particularly for the folks who are waitstaff or have done so in the past -- who are the cheapskate tippers?

from Pandagon: Q of the day - bad tippers

2006-12-17T07:49:00.000-08:00

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from Pandagon:

I’m in agreement with the comment that lesbians are bad tippers. I know tons of lesbians who make far more than I do and either tip poorly or leave no tip at all. Yet lesbians are demanding of a waiter’s time. – a Daily Bitch quote on the front page of the WashBlade
Is this some kind of stereotype that just won’t die? All my lesbo friends tip well since we know how little waitstaff are paid — tips are everything to these hard-working folks.

Kate and I are always generous tippers, so much so that in the places we regularly go, waiters and waitresses always remember us (sometimes after only being there once, which I cannot figure out) and want us to sit in their sections, and even chat with us about their day, their families, etc. We treat them like human beings — and watch in horror as we see so many patrons skip out without tipping, or become the demanding table from hell.

Maybe it’s because we’re both polite Southerners and the above-mentioned Daily Bitcher is from one of the big cities (where the dykes are cheap)? Who knows? I simply think it’s time to quash this stereotype.

Check out the comments and the update, too!

The Webtender Forums: Re: Tippers - Heterosexual vs Homosexual

2006-10-31T18:15:00.000-08:00

from The Webtender Forums:

Re: Tippers - Heterosexual vs. Homosexual

> My findings: gay men are excessive tippers, you
> almost feel bad for taking their money. Lesbians on the other hand
> are excruciatingly tight with their money and heterosexuals are fair.

> Thoughts anyone?

i totally agree, on a stereotype of reasoning. i believe gay men tip the
best, straight people set the norm for tipping, and blacks and lesbians are
the worst tippers.

my reasoning: back in 2002 i was going out with a cocktail waitress from
Laguna Beach. her brother was a bartender and is gay. He made a ton of money
each night. I was baffled. why did he make so much more than me, becuase the
crowd he serves is gay and the crowd i serve is straight?

her answer: many gay men work white collar jobs that pay well. most gay men
don't have children and families to support, along with being partnered. Dual
income, no kids. leaves alot of disposable income. it made sense to me.

as for blacks and lesbians being weaker tippers than the straight/white
segment of the population. I grew up in Seattle, which has a large gay
community (gays and lesbians). from my experience, lesbians are just shitty
tippers on the whole, no real reasoning other than experience.

[ . . . ]

from a Lesbian Wait Staff herself

2006-07-25T10:16:00.000-07:00

hollywood farm girl [writing about working in NY]:

I remember bartending one night at a ladies' bar.... We ended up so packed full of people, they had to start turning people away at the door. Seriously packed. The ladies who were able to get into the bar were not that happy about it either. Not really any place to sit, barely a place to stand, and forget about using the restroom. I turned to the cocktail waitress who was helping me: "What the hell is going on?" She laughed and shouted back, over the din: "A Melissa Etheridge concert just let out!" and then I lost her in the crowd. I worked my ass off that night. I saw some friends who had been able to attend. I didn't. Couldn't afford to: every last penny was getting saved up for my big trip to LA. So I missed a lot of Melissa Etheridge concerts, but I sure as hell waited on her concert-goers. Just FYI: lesbians are the worst tippers. Gay men are the best. Straight men come in second, straight women come in third, and my sexy sisters come in dead last. I figured it's cuz women make less than men, and PE teachers make less than everyone else. But I loved being around "family". I loved working in a gay bar. I'm sure my regulars all freaked out when I started becoming successful and lied my ass off to the press about my sexuality. Ugh. How shitty of me. My eyes were on a prize that others had insisted was The Prize for me, and I had forgotten my goal in the first place: happiness. It's easy to lose yourself when you place so many others in charge of your life.

The Cattyshack, Brooklyn, New York

2006-03-15T18:19:00.000-08:00

Here's the review of the Cattyshack, near Park Slope in Brooklyn. And here's the comment:

[ . . . ] I know us lesbians have a bad rap for tipping, but the coat check cost and cover charge stink!

from a comment on Bitter Waitress.com

2005-11-26T19:18:00.000-08:00

Excerpt from a comment on a discussion thread called Bitter Waitress.com.

[ . . . ]

Actually
I've heard lesbians are the worst tippers, and the worst to serve.
Complain about everything when nothing's wrong and leave horrible tips.

from Waiter Rant: The original?

2005-06-20T08:58:00.000-07:00

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from Waiter Rant: Gay Friendly, June 20, 2005:

A young woman walks into the Bistro.

“Is your restaurant gay friendly?” she asks.

“Yes Madam,” I reply. I’ve gotten this question before.

“I want to take my partner out for her birthday. We only patronize gay friendly establishments,” she says.

Wow. Militant.

“You come to the right place,” I say.

“Are you listed in any directories as gay friendly?” she queries.

“Yes.” I tell her which ones.

Satisfied the woman asks, “Can I have a table for two this Saturday at 7pm?”

“No problem,” I say. I take down the lady’s information.

“Can I have that nice table in the window?” she presses, “it’s the first birthday we’re celebrating together and I want to make it special.”

I juggle some things in the computer. “The table’s all yours.”

“Can you tell the waiter it’s a special occasion?” she asks.

“Madam I’ll take care of you myself.”

The woman smiles, “Thanks for your help.”

“You’re welcome.”

Saturday night rolls around. The ladies come in and sit at their romantic table. I pull out all the stops. I put a candle in the woman’s dessert and even sing happy birthday. They hold hands and talk quietly as they linger over liquors.

No one bothers giving them a second look.

I sigh contently.

Love is love. It comes in all shapes, sizes, and orientations. There’s not enough of it in the world.

The ladies signal for their check. I ring it up. The woman signs the bill. They get up to leave.

“Happy Birthday madam,” I say cheerfully as they depart.

“Thanks for a wonderful evening,” the woman gushes.

“It was my pleasure.”

After they depart I retrieve the bill folder from the table and open it.

On a ninety dollar bill they left me eight bucks.

Shocked I walk towards the back of the restaurant.

“Check this shit out,” I say waving the check in front of Louis.

“Ouch that hurts,” he says.

“I can’t believe it. I was so nice to them.”

“Was that the two lesbians?”

“Yeah.”

“Figures,” Louis replies, “Lesbians are horrible tippers.”

“That’s a tad stereotypical,” I counter.

“It’s true,” Louis shrugs, “I’m gay so I know.”

I don’t say anything. I’ve gotten good tips from lesbians before. I can’t figure out why these ladies were so cheap.

I sigh.

Assholes are assholes. They come in all shapes, sizes, and orientations. And there are more than enough of them in the world.

I close out the bill. I’m more hurt than angry.

We’re gay friendly. Not cheapskate friendly.

I’ll remember those ladies the next time around.

And here's a great comment:

the owner of a gay/lesbian restaurant in Portland, OR took out an advertisement in the local gay newspaper a couple of years back; his complaint was that lesbians en masse would come into his place, order water, smoke cig after cig, and not leave for hours.

it caused quite a furor because everyone objected to the stereotype that lesbians are notoriously bad tippers and often very rude in public settings.

the truth hurts.

PS: on a recent return visit to this place, I noticed that there was rather large oil painting of 4 women, sitting around a table, drinking coffee and smoking cigs; title: “Bad Tip Cafe”. my guess is that most of the clientele still don’t get it.

Comment: There are even better comments later in the comments. Enjoy!
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Mr. Rant on Lesbian Tipping Habits

2005-03-07T09:32:00.000-08:00

Mr. Rant asks the chicken-or-egg question:

Why I Haven't Been Posting on LJ Lately:

[ . . . ]

Consumed by chicken or egg paradox of "are lesbians bad tippers because they get bad service, or do we give them bad service because they're lesbians?" *

[ . . . ]

* mostly lesbians have told me that lesbians don't tip. It's been my experience that straight white guys who go out in baseball caps and sweat pants don't tip either, so I think it's more related to wardrobe than sexuality.

And the [lack of] reaction in the Comments:

Hey, stranger.

Nobody's yelling at me about my lesbians and white guys don't tip comment. What is up with that? Thought Seattle was all PC n' shit.

Apparently not.

from Curve, lesbian magazine

2003-03-23T16:38:00.000-08:00

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from Curve, a lesbian magazine. Are lesbians generally thought of as bad tippers and cheapskates?

I have a friend that worked as a waitress in the gayest part of San Francisco, the Castro District.

She tells me over and over again how lesbians in general are the worst tippers ever... she says that the reason lesbian bars and businesses do not prosper is that lesbians are cheapskates and do not support their community.

I know I am a great tipper unless the service is poor. I frequent the clubs on lesbians nights and spend money at lesbian businesses almost exclusively because I DO want to support the community.

But the other night when my wife and I went out to dinner with friends and our bill was over $100 and the woman who invited to treat us to dinner left a $10 tip. And it made me think.... maybe there is some truth to my other friends theory?

What do you think? Is there truth in this?

Comment: At least some of the participants in the discussion think there's some truth to the stereotype, though not necessarily themselves. Check out the comments.

from Bitch Session in 2003 - another one

2003-03-07T11:06:00.000-08:00

If you don't have the money to tip, you really don't have the money to drink.

from The W message board

2003-01-23T19:13:00.000-08:00

from a comment on The W message board; the discussion concerned bad service.

[ . . . ]

Sometimes when its "the girls" having dinner, the hostess will decide that we want the cutest guy waiter. Now my friends & I certainly appreciate a cute guy, but we actually value competence in our wait staff above cutie-ness. I'm sure Biff just tells himself that we must be lesbians when he gets a crappy tip, because he was too busy flirting & flexing to get our food & drinks delivered. Hostessing is such a complex job.

from Bitch Session in 2003

2003-01-17T11:04:00.000-08:00

To the so-called master mind of Liquid Ladies: If lesbians learned to tip, maybe bars would be more willing to open the doors to lesbian parties. P.S. Stop talking so much; people come to hear the music, not your voice.

from Dan Savage in The Stranger

2002-10-10T10:07:00.000-07:00

A discussion with Seattle wait staff, mention of our topic:

Dan: What's worse, fussy straight couples or fussy gay couples?

Kelly: Depends. Like lesbians?

Dan: No, like gay men.

Kelly: Lesbians are always worse tippers than gay men.

Dan: Why do you think that lesbians are such bad tippers? That stereotype just dogs lesbians everywhere, and yet there's always a grain of truth in stereotypes....

Alan: I mean, we can generalize about everybody. [Flying Fish] has a lot of great lesbian customers, and we serve a lot of polite gay men also. But then there are your fussy, old, 55-year-old queens and you just want to smack the shit out of them.

Kelly: They're the ones who hate women, who don't want a woman to wait on them; they want cute little busboys to come over to them.

John: I've never had a problem with waiting on gay men. They're great tippers, and always so nice to me.

Everybody: BECAUSE YOU'RE A CUTE YOUNG BOY.

Min: I once had an old, mean Southern queen order a mint julep from me, and even though I was busy, I did the whole thing--made an amazing mint julep with Maker's Mark and fresh mint that I scrounged up from the kitchen and chopped up myself; I even muddled, and garnished beautifully. I brought it to him, and he actually had the nerve to push his drink away and say, "Honey, I like my ice shaved--not crushed." And left without paying for his drink.

Dan: And Min's been treating gay men like shit ever since.

from Bitch Session in 2002

2002-10-04T11:00:00.000-07:00

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'Not necessarily on-topic, but close enough:

My bitch is to the pissy queens who go to an inexpensive restaurant and get a cheap dinner and order only water with their meal. They gulp their water down in five seconds and bitch and complain that the waiter "totally sucks and does not deserve a tip" because he is not stoping by every minute to refill the water: If you are shopping at a discount store, don't expect Nieman Marcus service.

What's wrong with the wait staff in our restaurants? If you're unhappy waiting tables, then quit. Don't take it out on your customers. If you want a tip, they put a fucking smile on your face, and come to my table at least once before you pass me the check and pretend you care how my meal was.

Comment: We can safely assume that the subjects of these bitches are gay men, not lesbians.